On the carpet square next to Eddie she sat criss-cross applesauce with tears rolling down her cinnamon freckled cheeks. As the tears fell she tried hard not to make a peep. Mrs. Sneidler had already scolded the class for talking, so obediently she sat mutely. Her head throbbed where Laura Fields had yanked her golden brown Dorothy braid for spite all because she made it to the pink square before Laura.
Dahlia wished with all her might that she could grow up to be Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz. She wasn’t allowed to have a pet, but she dreamed of the warm curling fur of a little Toto dog in her arms. She imagined the warmth of his little tongue licking her hand and the cool touch of his sniffy nose. She knew he would protect her.
A nudge from Laura snapped her back into reality. Eddie was answering the teacher now. She looked at his clean white button up shirt and bright blue shorts. He must have a lot of money she thought, as she looked down at her big toe poking out of the end of her old tennis shoes.
When the bell rang the other children ran to awaiting parents. She saw Laura and Stacia walk hand in hand as they talked excitedly. Noticing her, Laura rolled her eyes and made Stacia change direction so Dahlia could only see their backs as they strutted away. Why did Laura hate her so much?
Tightening the straps on her backpack she started the two-mile walk home. She wondered what it would be like to have parents that could pick her up from school. Down the alley, she walked startled by the neighborhood dogs barking out their boundaries. By the white picket fenced in yard, the strange man stood. He had an intent look on his face as he studied her. She felt uneasy for a moment until he smiled.
“Hello there Dahlia,” he said. “I am a good friend of your mother’s that’s how I know your name, don’t be afraid.”
Even with the friendly smile, Dahlia felt strange and shy. She kicked the loose gravel with her foot.
“I told her not to worry about you, I was going to show you my litter of kittens. They are only a week old. Your Mom thought you would like to see them, would you?”
Dahlia was curious, she loved kittens, but she felt uncertain about this stranger. She dug a small hole in the gravel with her toe.
“If you want to see them it won’t take long. The mother cat, she's real pretty too, has them right behind the bushes."
Turning toward the bushes he asked her to follow.
But as he turned toward the bushes she ran, and ran, not stopping to look behind her. She made it all the way to 1st. street. She pressed the crosswalk button to safely travel to the other side of the busy street. From the opposite side, she finally looked for her pursuer, but he hadn’t followed.
After a half hour, she turned down the dead end street. With a sigh, she spotted her little green house with the “For Rent” sign in the front yard. The blue Datsun was parked in the front. Dad was home! Rushing through the front door she called out, “Dad I’m home.” She could smell cigarette smoke as she heard the television blaring from the living room. Walking into the living room her dad was sprawled out on the couch snoring with a Budweiser in his hand. Cautiously she left the room not wanting to awaken him. She didn’t know what to expect when he was drinking.
“What do you mean you lost your job?” Her mother yelled as she slammed the cupboard.
“They didn’t give me a chance,” He explained with a slur.
Hidden away behind her door she promised herself she wouldn’t speak out or act like she heard her parents talking openly about divorce. With frustration, she realized the pain wouldn’t be silent. She began pulling her own braids, and tears came again. The little tattletales revealed that she really did care that her world was crumbling quickly to the ground. As she sniffled they argued over who had to feed ‘The little rat.”
“Am I a rat?” she whispered as she sat silently in the dusky light of the evening.
From outward observation, she appeared dull and withdrawn. But inside, her mind was moving quickly. The world of adults was shaky, dangerous, and uncertain. On the inside, though, she was free to say whatever she wanted. Carefully shutting her door she found them, cut out and hand-drawn paper dolls. Hidden in the huge family Bible her mother received from a relative before Dahlia was even born. Pulling them out she smiled with delight.
Her paper dolls didn’t look like much but they held endless possibility. They held the power to make her a beautiful queen with great wisdom. She could then banish cruel neighbors and issue peace treaties between parents. She could be so lovely and intelligent that Eddie would even sit to listen to her talk. She would be just too, sentencing only the meanest citizens like Laura Fields to clean all the toilets in the kingdom.
Knock. Knock. Fumbling to put her dreams away and out of reach she quickly rose to her feet.
“Time to eat Dahlia,” her mother mumbled
As she stood to leave the room she glanced at the Holy Bible the source of the only freedom she knew. Hidden there in the pages she hadn’t learned to read, she would someday find healing for this present chapter of her young lonely life.
No comments:
Post a Comment